Oh No, The Irony

Jesse Helms, the Big No, is dead. And it took an Irish radio talk show for me to find out he died on the fourth of July--the Irish are obsessed with politics. I am not so obsessed but feel like you should know what's right (treating people like human beings) and what is wrong (most human beings). I only comment here because as I've noted in the past, like Jesse, I'm a graduate of Wingate U., a place indebted to him for support. I met him several times, though he only stared at me, whether with disdain or incomprehension, I'm not sure. And I'm grateful for meeting the Dali Lama because of Jesse who brought him to Wingate--hating Communist China made strange bedfellows. He was also responsible for me meeting Henry Kissinger, Bob Dole, and Dan Quayle--for which I'm not so grateful. As part of my job at the college library I moved all of his papers around in the stacks before the Helms Center opened--occasionally reading some until I discovered how dull they were. Jesse Helms is gone and he will be...gone from now on, never changing, truly conservative.

I Look Like Val Kilmer Redux

So after screwing around yesterday about how an Irish museum guard told me, "You're the spitting image of Val Kilmer, you are." I know that sounds like stereotyped dialogue, but life is damned cliche. Anyway, my visual joke was that I wasn't the older, chubbier Kilmer but The Doors' Kilmer.

So today I get an email from "Vals Helpers." That's right, Val has "helpers." How does one get helpers? Are these just obsessed fans? Mel, I'm looking at you. Or are they employees? Or a sad, sad Kilmer himself? Included was the message, "These are current. Taken - June 08 at a benefit in Beverly Hills." Here is one of these pictures of Val Kilmer, who presumably I am the spitting image of. Enjoy.

I Am the Spitting Image of Val Kilmer

At least, that's what one of the museum guards at the National Museum at Collins Barracks told me. Clearly this person had to have done loads of acid and just finished watching The Doors before coming to work to make that mistake. I mean look at Kilmer on the left and me on the right...no resemblance whatsoever.

Going Green

Not environmental (why bother when we all know the environment is going to be destroyed by grey goo...or zombies), but Irish. That's right, I'm in Ireland. Possible home of some of my corrupt genetic material.

And here's a picture of The Hairy Lemon to prove it. Probably you can't read it, but that sign...the small and blurry one...that says, "The Hairy Lemon." Trust me, it does.

100th Post Blow Out!

That's right, kids, the blog has reached a "certain age." It has come into its own. Has noticed changes in its body. Has reached its 100th post. And to celebrate let's take a look back.

The people that made it possible:

Heather
Melody
Derek
Ben
Anonymous, especially Anonymous

The best video:





The best gag ever.


The best pic:


Random link

Well, that's it for the celebration and fond look back over the last 99 posts. It's like it was only a few months ago that this all began. And here's to the next 100...unless I get bored...

WARNING: Grey Goo

Have you ever wondered will the world end in fire or ice? Had you wondered this you wasted your time because the world will, in fact, be ending in grey goo. How do I know? Because of the wonders of the Internet (A quick aside: I used to get worked up over having to capitalize the Internet, but now I realize it is a proper name for that space where all the weird, terrible, wonderful urges of the world get refined into points of light, and so just as you capitalize Kalamazoo so should you capitalize the Internet). Anyway, so I was going to my goto site Google, though I have documented our rocky relationship, and though I have a Google bar right there in the top right hand corner of my browser, I still type in the site, but this time, instead of clicking down to the auto-fill Google, I hit enter on "goo." Instead of sending me automatically to Google or to some page trying to sell me Goo.com, I wound up on the Wikipedia page for "grey goo." Naturally, I took this to be a sign and was intrigued.

What is grey goo? Why it's "a hypothetical end-of-the-world scenario involving molecular nanotechnology in which out-of-control self-replicating robots consume all living matter on Earth while building more of themselves (a scenario known as ecophagy; eating the environment)." Of course. So apparently, nanotechnology will just turn us all to a grey goo byproduct in it's heedless lust to reproduce. One more thing for me to be worried about. What is wrong with machines and their carnal programming?

The only answer: we must teach nanobots abstinence.

It's a Book Montage

S.Craig's book montage

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Um...sort of? It's really just not working for me. A book F? A book row or six? Anyway it's colorful. And booky. Arty? I give up...